A long time ago I learned that many times a dream can  be a coping mechanism to help you deal with loss and other things in your life that may not be the most pleasant.

It was quite often I’d see my Grandmother in my dreams who has been gone for many years and I’ve always taken it as her way of remind me she’s still here.  Sometimes I’d see my Dad, and rarely my grandpa.

Last night was a different story, and hence the reason I’m putting it down as a memory.

I’d like to think I only dream of those I love, and those that for one reason or another Im just not mentally ready to let go of.  Since I do not see my father often in my dreams its always a pleasant change to have him there and last night was no exception.  I miss my Dad.  There was a bit of a change though in this dream that kinda irks me.  It was like going to one of my Dad’s families parties.  There was my Dad, his father, his brother, and a few others that I dont recognize.

Let me start by saying there is no love lost between my Dads father and I, and funny enough in the dream he was still as cold and stiff as I remember him.  Maybe its my own dislike and maybe I’m wrong but I. especially after Dad died, remember very little of affection from this man.

As usual my uncle looked but didn’t speak.

What happened next though was a bit odd, I was told we needed to talk and we had to walk away from the party.  I remember walking with Dad up some hill but I do not remember if his father was with us.

We end up at another party this time mostly with young adults and such and thats where I ran into a friend.  Some one I know who’s been struggling a lot lately and not having the best go of things.  Sadly our conversation was a bit short lived as he moved on to do other things, but I find it odd that he was there to begin with.

<Shrug>

Maybe Im missing some guy social interaction, maybe im just lonely.  I guess time will tell.

Was good to see my Dad though.

 

Oddly enough there are times where there is just far too much going on in my skull to actually get something down on the blog.

I can say however, I met an incredibly nice guy online last night from a random posting that has evolved in to some great conversations.

OK guys/gals the heats up and so is my inability to suffer fools, so for now rather than post something that eventually get my ass in trouble I’m going to sign out and write more later when the weather and my temper are far cooler :)

Have a good day all and I will write more soon.

 

Ya know its usually polite to wait until someone offers before turning them down.

Its seems that people regardless of how long you’ve known them still treat you like a fag first before a friend.

Late me make a point once again:

If we are friends, regardless of if you are hot or not, I’m not out to suck your cock or fuck your ass.  Get over yourself and realize that what was probably one of the best friendships you could have had is now in the can.

That shit hurts, period.  Lets hang out or go catch a movie, is not gay code for hey I wanna fuck, so telling me that dude your into women, really…I had no clue the ring on your finger I thought was just a tacky straight mans jewelery.

I mean seriously what the hell, would you say the same thing to one of your ‘straight’ friends?

I’m seriously so over people right now.

 

A nun walked into Mother Superior’s office and plunked down into a chair. She let out a sigh heavy with frustration.

‘What troubles you, Sister?’ asked the Mother Superior. ‘I thought this was the day you spent with your family.’

‘It was,’ sighed the Sister. ‘And I went to play golf with my brother. We try to play golf as often as we can. You know I was quite a talented golfer before I devoted my life to Christ.’

‘I seem to recall that,’ the Mother Superior agreed. ‘So I take it your day of recreation was not relaxing?’

‘Far from it,’ snorted the Sister. ‘In fact, I even took the Lord’s name in vain today!’

‘Goodness, Sister!’ gasped the Mother Superior, astonished. ‘You must tell me all about it!’

‘Well, we were on the fifth tee…and this hole is a monster, Mother-540 yard Par 5, with a nasty dogleg right and a hidden green…and I hit the drive of my life. I creamed it. The sweetest swing I ever made. And it’s flying straight and true, right along the line I wanted…and it hits a bird in mid-flight !’

‘Oh my!’ commiserated the Mother. ‘How unfortunate! But surely that didn’t make you blaspheme, Sister!

”No, that wasn’t it,’ admitted Sister. ‘While I was still trying to fathom what had happened, this squirrel runs out of the woods, grabs my ball and runs off down the fairway!’

‘Oh, that would have made me blaspheme!’ sympathized the Mother.

‘But I didn’t, Mother!’ sobbed the Sister. ‘And I was so proud of myself! And while I was pondering whether this was a sign from God, this hawk swoops out of the sky and grabs the squirrel and flies off, with my ball still clutched in his paws!’

‘So that’s when you cursed,’ said the Mother with a knowing smile.

‘Nope, that wasn’t it either,’ cried the Sister, anguished, ‘because as the hawk started to fly out of sight, the squirrel started struggling, and the hawk dropped him right there on the green, and the ball popped out of his paws and rolled to about 18 inches from the cup!’

Mother Superior sat back in her chair, folded her arms across her chest, fixed the Sister with a baleful stare and said… ’You missed the fucking putt, didn’t you?’

 

OK So my new blog IE this one is up and running. Let me know what you think of the format and the design. I’ll be testing it a lot so do not be to surprised if you see changes!

 

As many of you know this is my sounding board.  More-so for myself than others, and its a way for me to vent out either frustrations or thoughts that come to me that I don’t feel I can just easily turn to my neighbor and ask.

With that being said many people have approached me after some of my posts asking if it was about them.  I’m not a shy person when it comes to my feelings or thoughts and if ya bent me enough to post about it let me tell ya kiddo it would have your name on it.  Forgive and forget is great for some, but for me its remember and revisit.  Do I dwell on it?  No, but I will eventually throw it back atcha at sometime or another when it suits me.

Moving on.

I’ve posted to a position that would take me away from Oregon.  Good idea?  I dont know, I wont know till I try it.  I love my home in Oregon but sometimes we have to take chances to progress our lives forward.  I love my job and what I do but I need to take that next step.  I need to know that I’ve continued to reach and attempt to grow rather than find contentment in my current situation.

Dont get me wrong there is nothing wrong with being content in your situation, just for me I want more.  I want the next step, and if I have to move to get it, well so be it.

Alright I’ve blabbered long enough, here’s to ya.  Oh yeah and please dont be shy click the ads, believe it or not I get paid for it :) .

Take care.

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